Paraka (paraka) wrote,
Paraka
paraka

Emotional Impact in Canon

I'll be the first to admit, I'm an easy crier. I have hormone issues, at certain times of the month, it's not pretty to be around me, because looking at me the wrong way can make me cry.

The thing is though, I don't often cry over TV, which is surprising, because I get so emotionally attached to my shows. I'm sure part of that is that I don't watch all that much TV, and the kinds of TV I do watch. There are only a few times that I can remember where the shows I love really made me cry.

The first time, was when I was a teenager and watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Before I knew about fandom, and could find fics that *fixed* things. I spent all summer watching the taped episode I had and simply bawling every time Buffy had to kill Angel. They way she he got his soul back, just as it was too late. How he looked at her in confusion and she told him to shut his eyes just before gutting him with her sword. It killed me, and I can't even tell you the number of times I cried over it.

The second time was because of Queer as Folk. Surprisingly it was because of the bashing. When I first discovered QaF s3 was airing, so when the bashing happened, I sat in shock for a moment, then threw the s2 DVD on and got a nice quick answer. No the time that really made me cry was in s5 when the bombing happened. I was one of the people that got my hands on the screener eps way before they aired, but because I was beginning to leave the fandom I didn't watch them till a long time later. I was in Guelph with raxhel and we spent the day doing a QaF marathon. I had to head back to Ottawa that day so had to leave soon if I was going to get home at a decent hour, but we decided to watch one more episode. The episode with the bombing. I totally did not see that coming (which is surprising considering the spoilers that were abounding in fandom, and the fact that I was watching it after it aired). That was one of the longest drives home ever. I cried on and off for the whole 5 hour drive home.

The third time that I can remember it happening was when I was in China. raxhel and I were watching all the SG-1 episodes, and despite the fact that season 9 was already being aired, I wasn't actually all that spoiled for the show. I knew that Daniel died and that he came back for season 8, so his dying didn't really make me cry. But no one told me about Janet. I remember kind of rolling my eyes at the episode, since they kept trying to imply that Jack was dead, and I knew that would never happen. I totally expected it to be the soldier. When they showed at the end that the soldier was still alive, I was confused but I still never suspected. When it turned out to be Janet... I was so heart broken about it. All night I couldn't help but think about it, and I couldn't help crying all over again whenever that happened.

The most recent time that happened to me was when I was watching Doctor Who. I never saw it coming (I didn't even think I *liked* Doctor Who that much). Donna was the first companion that I actually liked. What they did to her. OMG it just hurt so much. I have actually written essays on why it hurt so much when Donna lost her memories. She was just so awesome and others could see but she couldn't. She let her circumstances blind her to the strength she had within her and when she finally started to find it within herself it was ripped away from her. God, it just broke my heart.

I feel I should also mentioned that I cried after Sunday in Stargate Atlantis, but they were more bitter tears of anger directed at TPTB (exploding *tumours* seriously? WTF!). Also, I was spoiled for Carson's death so it didn't have the same emotional impact. I find surprise is a big part of what makes these things hit me so hard. It's one of the reasons I avoid spoilers whenever I can. When Vic died in QaF I didn't really feel anything because I had been spoiled for it and I decided I didn't really like that. I've avoided spoilers ever since.

Anyways, what about my flisters? Have you ever cried or been emotionally punched by one of your shows? Is it a common thing? Is it rare? Do you enjoy it? Do spoilers play a part for you?

ETA: As I read everyone's comments and they mention times they've cried, I keep realizing that, hey, I cried then too (OMG, how could I have forgotten Tosh's death! I totally cried for that! More than once even!). I'm beginning to think my crying at my TV shows is more common than I realized....
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